The Random Thinker

YOU MIGHT BE A PASTOR IF…
~ You’ve waded in a creek wearing a necktie.
~ You’ve ever dreamed you were preaching only to waken and discover that you were.
~ You’d rather negotiate with terrorists than the church organist.
~ You see a picnic as no picnic.
~ You’ve ever wanted to fire the church and form a congregation search committee.
~ You’ve been tempted to take up an offering at a family reunion.
~ You’ve ever wanted to give the sound man some feedback of your own.
~ You’ve ever wanted to lay hands on a deacon, and you didn’t mean praying for him.
~ You often feel like you are herding cats instead of shepherding sheep.
~ Your sermons have a happy ending…everyone’s happy when it ends.
~ You’ve never preached on TV, because your wife made you get down before you broke something.
~ You feel that it is your job to comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable.

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This was today’s email from Mikeysfunnies.com It made me laugh, and I hope you laughed when you read it.

Yesterday we experienced one of those rare days in the life of a church. We had a great time of worship at both morning worships AND we hosted a prayer breakfast for over 200 participants in the Dixie Majors World Series in Florence this week.

God was looking out for me . . . This was ALSO the day Lordsong was coming to morning worship. I was able to float between 8:30 services and that was interesting. During that hour, there were close to 500 people in two worships hearing the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

Were there problems in the parking lot?? I am sure. Were there people that complained about how loud Lordsong was? Yep, I personally heard from two of them. But all in all, it was a good day. A big, big day.

I think God is showing us what He will do if we will just LISTEN AND OBEY.

What a week! With the exception of Sunday and Wednesday, baseball was on my diet EVERY DAY this week! And it was good . . . And, that is a new one for me. In years past, you would have NEVER been able to hold me down and make me watch a bunch of kids I did not know. I guess with Drew helping me in my responsibilities, it made it fun. We both enjoyed watching the teams, chasing the home run balls, and getting to know the Dixie Youth officials. It was really neat, and I would do it again!

Now, one more obligation: Ebenezer is sponsoring a prayer breakfast for the older boys and their Dixie Majors World Series that is in town THIS COMING week. While 8:30 worship is happening in the sanctuary, there will be around 270 players and coaches in our Family Life Center in a worship of their own. Curtis and Leesa Hudson will be leading that time with song and testimony.

And when all of that is done, back to normal — I am glad for this, but things NEVER slow down at EBC!!! Thanks to God that He has plenty for us to do!

This year, the City of Florence is hosting the DYST at Freedom Florence. Both Minors and Major are playing here this week. So, 24 teams from all over the state are participating in this thing and it is an awesome spectacle. I have the privilege of serving on the tournament committee (in a very minor role) and I am getting to watch this thing from the ground up. And, believe me, there is a lot of work going in to making this thing happen. You wouldn’t believe it.

It makes me appreciate our City of Florence Recreation department. It makes me appreciate volunteers who give hundreds of hours just to make this event happen. It makes me appreciate the Dixie Youth organization and all these folks do for the kids.

Is there a down side?? Only when coaches act like knuckleheads, and that has only happened a couple of times so far. And, after all, it IS a tournament, so you know that will happen.

Would I do this again?? IN A HEARTBEAT!!

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A little ditty about life (I couldn’t pull the Jack and Diane thing off). I sit here amazed at life and how quickly it can change. The older I get, the FASTER time flies. I have a son who will begin 7th grade this year — he was ONE MONTH old when we moved to Florence from New Orleans. My sweet little daughter is out right now with some friends . . . Some female, some NON-female. Yes, I am dealing with that issue. She will be a junior this year. WOW, time flies.

I warn all parents of young kids that YOUR TIME IS COMING. Enjoy it while you can, because they grow up QUICKLY. People always told me that and I would smile, nod my head, and think “yeah, right.” Now I realize THEY WERE TELLING THE TRUTH.

I would tell John Cougar that life does go on, but the thrill of living it is all in how you live. All in what you make of it. And after almost 41 years on this earth, and 12 and a half years at Ebenezer, the thrill is STILL HERE.

And for that I am grateful.

I would write that I cannot believe Michael Vick was indicted on federal charges for dogfighting, and doing it across state lines, but I am not surprised. Sadly, this is not an unusual thing for one of the Vick boys. And I hate it for the Falcons . . . He is a talented qb, just staying in trouble too much.

I guess athletes really don’t get into more trouble than the average joes around them (maybe a LITTLE more), so I guess the spotlight just makes it look a lot worse. We obsess too much over celebrities and athletes. Oh, and did you hear this guy named David Beckham is coming to the LA Galaxy?? (heh heh heh . . . Who HASN’T seen or heard that).

Perhaps our obsession with popular athletes and celebs give them way too much credence and attention. Maybe we have created a monster in the media machine that WE FEED and then complain about. So can WE do about it??? TURN IT OFF. Turn off the TV and computer!!

I saw you wince at that suggestion, but it is the truth. We have created the media blitz that surrounds celebs BECAUSE WE WATCH IT.

And, as for the Vick boys, I don’t even know what happened to Marcus. Michael is a tremendous athlete, and I really hope this is not the beginning of his slippery slope. But you never know.

Yes, Goldielocks would say that Florence is JUST RIGHT . . . And I would agree with her. Sure, I get aggravated sometimes when I watch the local news and see what the producers actually think QUALIFY as news. But, then again, watching SportsCenter this morning I had the same feeling. Makes me feel better about our local stations (although now one could argue that we don’t have any local stations). And I do NOT miss hearing about the murders of the week as we would hear EVERY NIGHT in New Orleans.

Florence is close enough to the beach, but not too close. And not too far from the mountains. You can dine at almost any type of restaurant you can imagine. Shopping is okay, but that is not my forte ANYWAY. Florence has good schools (for the most part) and all kinds of entertainment options.

But the greatest thing about Florence is the people. I cannot say enough about the people. I was talking to someone last night who moved here recently, and I think she and her family will be very happy in Florence. And the people will make the difference. I just hope we never change. Yes, change IS inevitable, but I really hope we remember what makes Florence great.

Every person preparing to date should have to read this:

THINGS I WISH I’D KNOWN BEFORE I DATED
~ Never date anyone who is rude to the waiter/waitress.
~ Never date anyone who is rude to their mother.
~ If they have a tendency to be rude to you now, just wait.
~ If you date someone who doesn’t share your standards, they’ll lower yours.
~ The five most essential words for a healthy, vital relationship: “I apologize” and “You are right.”
~ Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
~ If he/she says you’re too good for him/her, believe it.
~ If they have a tough time apologizing now, just wait.
~ Never date anyone who spends more time gazing into the mirror, than they spend gazing into your eyes.

today’sTHOT============================
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall never cease to be amused.

(Copied from http://www.mikeysfunnies.com)

In all of the Barry Bonds talk lately, there has been a revisiting of Hank Aaron’s breaking of the Babe Ruth homerun record. I was eight when it happened. I will never forget seeing it. I really don’t know if I watched it live or saw it as a news clip, but I think it was live . . . And, it was meaningful.

Hank Aaron did it as a average joe — Well, he was WAY above average, but he did it on his own strength. Not a massive, hulking figure . . . Just an average-build guy who could knock the cover off a baseball. He was the REAL DEAL.

Some did not like him because he is a man of color. Some, because he stood up for civil rights at a crucial time in our nation’s history. But whether you like him or not, you must respect the fact that he did it RIGHT. No steroids . . . no massive muscles . . . Just determination and ability. That is the way to break a record!!!!!!!

What of the steriod generation of today? I don’t know. Their foreheads sure are HUGE, and they look massive. And, for the most part, they deny steroid use. Time will tell the true story. But when it is all said and done, none of them measure up to ole Hammerin Hank.