One Pastor's Perspective

THINGS I LEARNED IN SOUTH CAROLINA…
1) A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.
2) There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in SC.
3) There are 10,000 types of spiders, and all 10,000 of them live in SC.
4) If it grows, it’ll stick ya. If it crawls, it’ll bite cha.
5) “Onced” and “Twiced” are words.
6) It is not a shopping cart, it’s a buggy.
7) “Jaw-P?” means, “Did y’all go to the bathroom?”
8) People actually grow and eat okra.
9) “Fixinto” is one word.
10) There is no such thing as lunch. There is only dinner and then there is supper…
11) Iced tea is appropriate for all meals, and you start drinking it when you’re two.
We do like a little tea with our sugar.
12) Backwards and forwards means, “I know everythin’ bout you.”
13) The word “jeet” is actually a phrase meaning, “Did you eat?”
14) You don’t have to wear a watch, because it doesn’t matter what time it is. You work until you’re done or it’s too dark to see…
15) You don’t PUSH buttons, you MASH em.
16) You measure distance in minutes.
17) You switch from heat to A/C in the same day.
18) All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal.
19) You know what a “Dawg” is.
20) You carry jumper cables in your car – for your own car.
21) You only own five spices: salt, pepper, Texas Pete , Tabasco and ketchup.
22) The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local gossip and high school football…
23) You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.
24) You find 100 degrees “a bit warm.”
25) You know all four seasons: Almost summer, summer, still summer, and Christmas.
26) Going to Walmart is a favorite past time known as “goin’ Walmartin” or “off to Wally World.”
27) You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good hog killin’ weather.
28) Fried catfish is the other white meat.
29) We don’t need no dang Driver’s Ed… If our mama says we can drive, we can drive dag-nabbit.
30) You understand these jokes and forward them to your SC friends and those who just wish they were from South Carolina !!!!!

(From http://www.mikeysfunnies.com/)

A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day, only to be confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.

“Good morning,” said the young man. “If I could take a couple of minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners.”

She said, “I’m broke and haven’t got any money!” and she proceeded to close the door. Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed it wide open. “Don’t be too hasty!” he said. “Not until you have at least seen my demonstration.”

And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet. “If this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder.”

The old lady stepped back and said, “Well let me get you a fork, ’cause they cut off my electricity this morning.”

(Hmmm . . Must’ve happened on April 15th)

As I was slaving on the elliptical machine at the Y this morning, I noticed a discussion that drew my earphones away from SportsCenter (GASP!) and to CNN. Anderson Cooper had two “Christian” ministers on and was discussing the impending DEATH of Christianity in America!

Gee, thanks Anderson, for the heads up!!

Specifically, they were slamming Rick Warren for PREACHING THE BIBLE!!! And, according to CNN, Christianity is on its way out because of its stance on homosexuality.

I don’t know who either minister was . . . The conservative one did a great job, and honestly his views were pretty solid and biblical. The other claimed the Bible says nothing about homosexuality, and that narrowed-minded people like Warren and James Dobson have spewed this hatred for decades. And this man’s on-screen tag was “Christian Minister.”

I am sorry. First of all, I believe America is a nation of people, many of whom CLAIM to be Christian. But when you get right down to it, narrow is the path that leads to salvation and wide is the path that leads to destruction (at least, that is what the Son of God said). I think the majority moved away from Christianity many, many years ago. And that DOES NOT CAUSE ME TO FEAR OR STRAY. I will stay on the narrow path, thanks.

Secondly, I will NOT stray from what God’s word says because it is not mine to CHANGE!! Someone last week stood in my office and told me that all of her life, she had attended different churches and never had she heard God’s word in a way she could understand until now. At Ebenezer. I told her that is simply because we teach and preach God’s word, and try not to add to it!! His word IS easy to understand and apply if you give it a chance.

Third, you might not be able to call America a Christian nation, but we who call Christ Savior have a job to do. We are NOT DEAD, nor is the church DYING IF WE DO OUR JOBS. TELL OTHERS ABOUT HIM!!!

I’ve heard and seen so much on national media outlets lately about the death of Christianity in America, and that leads me to believe that there ARE influences in those outlets that would like to see Christianity die. So, what do YOU think church?? Shall we oblige them?? OR SHALL WE DO WHAT WE WERE PUT HERE TO DO??

As for me and my house . . . well, you know how that one ends.

This week begins spring break for Florence School District One. Drew is going to the beach with our youth. Krissy has possibly FOUR softball games this week, so she probably won’t make it. And, yet, there is an 80% chance of rain today, so tonight’s game is most likely a wash. Our kids settle in for an easy week and things slow down for parents as well.

But what about Easter. What about the old rugged cross and the empty tomb? Yes, we talked all about them yesterday. But what do they mean to us today?? EVERY DAY??

Truth is, Easter never leaves us. We should celebrate it EVERY day, and most definitely every SUNDAY.

Can you handle it?

Our Maundy Thursday worship is a tradition at Ebenezer that dates back for many years . . . I’ve been here for 14 and it dates WAYY before me. It is a service of shadows, a time to remind us of those last hours Jesus had with His disciples and leads us up to the crucifixion and death of Jesus. It is a solemn and reverent event. This year was particularly good, and I attribute much of that to the hard work of Ed Self.

And there is something that amazes me. Every year we have a Lord’s Supper that is unusual for us, and probably for most Southern Baptist churches. Our Lord’s Supper is a time when people come up to the communion table, as families, and receive the elements. We do have our little cups of grape juice, but in this service we use two round loaves of bread. I break the bread and everyone comes up and pinches a little piece off. It is something different for us, and very meaningful. It is a great time to be together and where it is a moment of silence, it is also a moment of community and closeness.

I am amazed and thrilled at how a silent worship time can feel so close. And I know the answer to it all is FAMILY. And I am thankful for my Ebenezer family.

PS – The BEST way to take the bread in that is to pinch a little from the INSIDE of the loaf. It is much easier than trying to tear some off of the crust, and I think it tastes better, too!!!!

In honor of my 700th post, I will share a joke from www.mikeysfunnies.com

Because, in true David Wike form, I would LOVE for you to laugh today!

One Sunday morning when my son, David, was about 5, we were attending a church in our community. It was common for the preacher to invite the children to the front of the church and have a small lesson before beginning the sermon. He would bring in an item they could find around the house and relate it to a teaching from the Bible.

This particular morning, the visual aid for his lesson was a smoke detector. He asked the children if anyone knew what it meant when an alarm sounded from the smoke detector.

My child immediately raised his hand and said, “It means Daddy’s cooking dinner. “

today’sTHOT============================
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight because by then, your body and your fat are really good friends.

I am proud to be a parent of the WF Lady Knights softball team. Last night we lost. A really close one. And, honestly, two thoughts come to mind:

1. We are VERY PROUD of our girls and how they played their hearts out, and played well. It was a close game and they never gave up, even in the face of overwhelming adversity.

2. We are SHOCKED at the lack of integrity of some of the adults that work in high school sports. Coaches, umpires . . . You get the idea. I have NEVER been to a game in which the outcome was so controlled by a coach.

Since I must be careful, let me just say that I am EXTREMELY THANKFUL for Denise and Herb Carter. The integrity they have taught my daughter will go far in her life. I have known these two for many years, almost the entire 14 years I have been in Florence, and I am glad my daughter goes to WEST. And, I feel sorry for what girls in some of the other schools are learning, because I know it will impact their lives for years to come.

I deal with it every day as a pastor.