One Pastor's Perspective

This week, a very special couple in my life is moving to Nashville, TN.  Two friends whom I will miss … It’s gonna change the face of things in my world.

I’m writing about Ted and Betty Mears.  Having them at EBC has meant the world to me.  Ted was the last long-tenured pastor to serve Ebenezer.  He served from the early 70’s until the mid 80’s.  Ted is a true gentleman and his love for God and God’s people is evident in everything he does.  Betty is fun … That’s the best word I can come up with for her.  When I talk to her, I ALWAYS enjoy it.  She has a sense of humor that is very compatible with mine and we seem to be on the same wavelength more often than not.

It might seem unusual that I consider them to be such good friends, but that is what they are.  Yes, they are my parents’ age, but Diana and I have a friendship with them that defies age and generational boundaries.  Unlike many of our other friends, they understand the intense pressure on us and our family.  Unless you’ve been there, you really could never understand the pressure and unreal expectations some place on pastors.  Ted and Betty get it.  And they’ve given both of us much help with that!!

It’s funny: They’ve always worried their presence would be intrusive on my pastorate, not realizing they’ve always been two of my biggest supporters and two people I’ve needed to have in my life.  And, while I certainly understand why they are moving (their ENTIRE family is now in Tennessee), I SOOO wish they could stay just a little while longer.  It’s ironic that they’ve worried about overstaying their welcome and I’m sitting here DREADING that moving truck that will be here this week.

People have always asked me “Who pastors the pastor??”  I DO have a handful of good friends at Ebenezer with whom I can share my issues and fears.  And two of them are moving to Tennessee this week.  And I will miss them terribly.

This is the first blog entry for the week. And it’s Friday. I haven’t really had writers block, so to speak, but this has been a week full of things about which I just can’t blog. Come with the territory as a pastor. Honestly, this week I strongly considered starting that anonymous blog I’ve always threatened to do. But that would never work: I blog from my heart and would be too easily figured out.

I can say this has been a week of pinnacles and valleys. There have been great victories and I passed through a few mine fields. And there has been heartache. But, again, it comes with the territory. But no complaints here!! Just happy to live to serve another day!

This week I visited a great influencer of me when I was young. He is much older now, in poor health, and struggling. But he will always be my pastor!!! And Eddie Greene will probably never know (on this side of eternity) what a tremendous influence he still has in my life. I’m thankful for pastors like him, like Lonnie Shull, like John Dill, who helped me when I was a young Christian. They taught me stuff you just can’t learn in seminary. Every time I walk into a hospital room or a situation in which I minister, they go with me… Whether they realize it or not.

And I know my responsibility is to pay that forward to the next generation.

It’s been a while since I did this, so I thought I would blog a little update on where Dad is medically and where my left arm stands right now …

Dad is physically doing well.  From a memory standpoint, not so much … He has been in therapy to strengthen his legs and is physically able to do more than he’s done in a while.  He is still in a wheelchair, but they’re working on his ability to get in and out of a car!  If this all works out, Mom will be able to use her Buick to take him on shorter trips with the help of a transport wheelchair (which will be a little lighter).  All of it still concerns me, because Dad’s ability to get in and out of the car is  heavily dependent on him NOT being tired.

I call them everyday.  And almost every day I have to remind Dad that I live in Florence and I have to remind him of what I do vocationally.  I know this is tough for Mom, because it’s getting tough for me!  But, honestly, it’s not about me …

As far as my left arm goes, I guess not much has changed.  I’ve been out of therapy for months now.  I haven’t seen my doctor for months.  So far, no pain.  Even though its been more than a year, the swelling is STILL going down weekly.  I can see new visual signs of that almost on a weekly basis.  I cannot straighten my arm, and the doctor does not want me to do that.  He says the cartilage is messed up pretty bad in that elbow, and I don’t need to do that.  Also, if it pops out of joint I will be going DIRECTLY to the hospital, and then DIRECTLY to surgery.  Been there and done that once.  Don’t want to do it again!!

This is funny now, but I wasn’t too happy when someone tried to manually straighten my arm in the office hallway one day.  it was a well-meaning person, but OOWIE did that hurt!!!  A few weeks ago I tried to put on a sports coat.  Did not hang right because my shoulder is still goofed up.  I even went up a size or two, and it still didn’t fit right!!!  Thank God for my doctoral robe.

People act surprised that I don’t have pain, but I honestly don’t.  Hope that doesn’t change anytime soon!!!

I was talking on Facebook to one of my oldest … no wait, it’s not that she’s old.  And she is definitely not the oldest friend I have.  But she has been a friend since we were both little kids growing up at Washington Avenue Baptist Church in Greenville.

Anyway, Joy Crenshaw Branon and I were talking on Facebook a little while ago and she reminded me that she remembers when I was a little kid in Sunday School and proudly announced to the whole class “When I grow up, I’m gonna be a preacher!”

In the last couple of months, there have been times when I’ve thought “If I could only go back in time and tell that little kid, ‘Hey Nucklehead!  BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR!!'”  (And I would sneak some $$ back and invest it ALL in Apple)

Hey, kid … you have NO IDEA what you are asking for:

• Sleepless nights
• Times when you feel God is your ONLY ally
• Late night phone calls
• Vacations you will have to leave your family to do your job
• Times when you can do nothing right, no matter which way you move
• Stress
• Heartache
• This list could go on and on ….

I was thinking about that the other day, and then it hit me …  There would also be times of:

• Seeing God at work FIRSTHAND and seeing Him do things that you wouldn’t believe unless you saw it firsthand
• Getting to spend some of the happiest moments with your extended family (mine is EBC) and see babies born, celebrate great victories in life, help marriages get started on the right foot
• Having the opportunity to help young Christians grow and getting the most awesome reward of seeing them blossom in God and follow Him with great faith!!!
• Being entrusted with the privilege to help families in their times of greatest need
• Being loved by your church
• And, again, seeing the miracles of God from a front-row seat

The Holy Spirit Himself reminds me that I am one of the most fortunate men in Florence, SC, because I get to be the point man for My Savior in my family that is Ebenezer.  And when I think about all of that, I would tell that kid to trust in the Lord with all of his little heart, and to lean not on his own understanding.  In everything he does, acknowledge God and follow Him, and God Himself will pave the way for that kid.

(And, if you have a few bucks, invest in Apple when it first goes public even though everyone around you is telling you that Apple Computers is a mere fad.  Trust me, kid … )

Tomorrow …  Tomorrow is the one-year anniversary of the day that will live in infamy (at least, in my world).  The day I fell and broke both arms!  (Read about it here:  https://davidrwike.com/2011/03/06/here-is-how-it-happened/ )

I look at how far I’ve come and know GOD is still on His throne and still in control.  My left elbow still won’t straighten out, but it will bend in both directions much further than we ever thought it would.  In fact, the entire situation has improved much more than we ever thought it would.  There was a point in time when I didn’t know if I would ever be able to DRIVE again, much less get to a place where my left arm was usable.

What does the future hold for it??  Have no idea.  The doctor talked for a while about eventually doing a joint replacement, but that will be YEARS down the road.  I was discharged from therapy months ago, but the arm continues to improve and swelling is STILL slowly going down.

And God is still on His throne.  And that is enough for me!!!

If you know me, you know how much I love basketball.  Back to that thought in a minute.

I’ve been sitting here at my desk trying to recharge for 11am service (if I dare say this, morning worships really zap me.  But I love them!!).  I glanced over at a poem I found YEARS AGO.  Never could find the author of this poem then, but I keyed it in, printed it, and put it in a place on my shelf where I would always see it.  Why, you ask??  Read it and see for yourself:

That Little Chap Who Follows Me

A careful man I ought to be,
A little fellow follows me,
I do not dare to go astray
For fear he’ll go the selfsame way.

I cannot once escape his eyes,
Whate’er he sees me do, he tries;
Like me, he says, he’s going to be,
The little chap who follows me.

He thinks that I am good and fine,
Believes in every word of mine
The base in me he must not see,
The little chap who follows me.

I must remember as I go,
Through summer’s fun and winter’s snow,
In building for the years to be
The little chap who follows me!

I put that on my shelf YEARS AGO when Drew was still really small to remind me of one of the most important jobs God gave me:  Being a dad!!  The poem is about a little boy, but this applies to Krissy, too!  In my call to ministry, God has called me first and foremost to be HUSBAND to my bride (whom I love deeply) and FATHER to my children (whom I also love deeply). We all need those reminders that there are very special people in our lives that develop and grow BASED ON HOW WE LIVE AND WHAT WE SAY!!!

This morning, on a whim, I google this poem and FINALLY discovered who the author is …

Hall of Fame former basketball coach of the UCLA Bruins, the late John Wooden!!!  And, quite frankly, that makes it even more special to me!!

Today would probably be a good day to begin with my occasional disclaimer:  The thoughts on this blog are mine.  They are neither the thoughts nor opinions of Ebenezer Baptist Church.  And I am imperfect.  I make mistakes (Gasp … I  know.  But it’s true).  I am human, not cyborg (although I have looked into preserving my brain after I die!!)

This morning I was reading a passage of scripture.  One that I’ve read and preached many times before.  One of the things I like about using technology is the fact that I can look a passage up on my iPad or on certain websites, then change the Bible version, and instantly see it from another point of view.  For some unknown reason I decided to look this passage up in The Message.

The Message is a paraphrase of the Bible published by NavPress in the mid-1990s.  I am not typically fond of paraphrases and will rarely quote one when preaching because I like a word-for-word translation.  But when I read this one, although it is definitely not a word-for-word, it speaks to me.  It reminds me of the heart intent of what Jesus spoke in the Sermon on the Mount.

In the NIV, the words of Jesus from Matthew 7:1-5 read like this:

 ¹ “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. ²For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.  ³ “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? ⁴ How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? ⁵ You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.

Jesus is pretty clear … The way we judge others is EXACTLY how we will be judged.  That convicts me deeply.  But I have never seen anyone with a “plank” sticking out of his eye.  Now, mind you, I’m sure there have been times when I’ve had one.  But literally, the only plank I’ve ever seen sticking out of anyone in the past few years was the one sticking out of Bill Watkins’ hand a few weeks ago.  If you want to see it, just ask him:  He’ll show you the pictures!!

NOW … when I read this in The Message, here is what I found:

 ^1-5 “Don’t pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults— unless, of course, you want the same treatment. That critical spirit has a way of boomeranging. It’s easy to see a smudge on your neighbor’s face and be oblivious to the ugly sneer on your own. Do you have the nerve to say, ‘Let me wash your face for you,’ when your own face is distorted by contempt? It’s this whole traveling road-show mentality all over again, playing a holier-than-thou part instead of just living your part. Wipe that ugly sneer off your own face, and you might be fit to offer a washcloth to your neighbor.

WOW!!  That rips me to the core!!  Because I’ve never literally had a plank in my eye, but I’ve had sneers on my face.  Many times.  And I think The Message really schooled me this morning on the intent of Matthew 7:1-5.

So, paraphrases are NOT ALL BAD.  Especially when you realize you are not reading a word-for-word translation.  They can still speak to God’s heart intent for His word.

Excuse me now while I go check the mirror …

This morning I find myself up way too early and burned out.  The events of the past four weeks have been like a gauntlet and I am hesitant to even take a step today for fear I will trip another land mine.  It’s been a wild ride, and nothing fun about it.

Yesterday we buried another strong servant of God at Ebenezer.  Yes, Geneva Tolson had been sick for several years now.  But I remember not so long ago when she was hard at work building the kingdom of God in the ways she could.  Once again, I hurt for her family and I wonder who God will send to take her place.  While we were finishing Geneva’s funeral, another funeral started 100 miles away.  It was for the mother of my good friend, Richard Hooss.  I was thankful Ed assisted with that funeral and was able to be there for the Hooss family.  (If the plural of goose is geese, is the plural of Hooss “Heese?”  I’ve asked Richard that question before … He says yes.)

Oscar Holland said something at Geneva’s funeral that struck a chord with me.  He talked about how he’d seen people full of kindness and grace at Ebenezer, and remarked that Ebenezer had many people who fit that description.  Maybe more than any other church he’d seen.

I’ve seen that in the last month, too.  I’ve seen families full of graciousness and mercy, even when mourning the loss of someone they love.  Even in the tough times of dealing with death.  And that has blessed me.

And, in spite of all of the baggage that comes with being a pastor, the grace, mercy, and love of the people of Ebenezer will be what pulls me through.  And I’ll do my best, in my imperfect ways, to pull you through.  As will the staff of EBC.

And for that I am thankful.

Yes, I am an introvert. You might’ve noticed the first Introvert post is gone.  I should’ve been MORE of an introvert in what I said the first time.

I chose to take the first post down, but here is the link to the blogpost from Ron Edmondson.  It is really worth the read!!

http://www.ronedmondson.com/2010/08/7-pitfalls-of-being-an-introverted-pastor.html

Yesterday, from the pulpit, I told EBC if I had to assign a grade to the year 2011, I would give it an “A!”  Then I said I would explain that at another time and another place.  Then, about 45 seconds later, I explained it … But here is a more thorough explanation.

When I reflect on 2011, in some ways it has been extremely difficult.  Bordering on brutal.  Of course, there was THAT DAY I should’ve called in sick to work:  March 3.  I took a wrong step off a curb, broke 2 elbows (I would’ve broken three if I’d had 3) and my life is now changed forever.  I’d never been so helpless in my adult life.  I’d never gone FIVE solid months without being able to sleep all night, regardless of whether or not I took pain medication.  For me, one of the worst things about it was the uncertainty for the first ten weeks, not knowing if my left elbow would heal tight or if the doctor would have to go back in and start all over.

There was a lot of prayer and there was a lot of trust.  After surgery, while laying in the hospital, I remember hearing Steve Green in my mind singing “Praise the Lord.”  I’ve always believed that God inhabits the praise of His children.  So I started praising Him.  This was NOT a reaction to pain medication or a delirious outcry.  I remember consciously realizing God can and will make a difference IF I permit Him to do it.  I started praying “Lord, use this somehow.”  He has used it soooooo many times in the past few months that I cannot list it all here.  HE IS GOOD, and HE IS FAITHFUL.  And He makes GOOD on His promises!!!

Now, I realize that all of this sounds like what you would expect a pastor to write … But I’m telling you this is 100% true.  And He didn’t do this because I am a pastor … and I didn’t cry out to Him because I have some special communication channel with Him (some people really believe that).  I don’t have a bat phone to heaven, although if I did, that would be REALLY COOL.  No, I was able to make those petitions because I AM HIS CHILD.  Plain and simple.  And, if YOU are His child, YOU have the same opportunity to give Him your disasters and He can make something incredible out of it.  And YOU can bring Him glory with it.

So, all in all, I DO give 2011 an “A!”  God is on His throne, He is still working miracles all around us, and He WILL use a wretch like me when I allow Him to!!!!